Due To


Due to the flu
I have died

Due to the flu
I have passed

Due to the flu
I freeze

Due to the flu
I sweat

Due to the flu
I cannot think

Stay awake
Stay asleep
Write normally
Focus on anything

Due to my children
Giving me this gift of the flu

I wish the first two stanzas of this poem were actually true…

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I


I reflect back
Into darkness
To a place
I cannot understand

I see
But yet am blind

I feel
But can’t remove the hollow

An empty space inside
A void forever unfilled

I sit
I reflect

I watch trapped
Helpless

Angry at my own blackened thoughts
Resigned to never being well

I
Me

Slowly slipping
Into insanity

Drowning inside myself…

Follow Me


Follow me

Up this path

Around the bend

To the top of the cliff

Look out

Down over the edge

See how far we have come

High

So far up

Never turning back

Now take my hand

Look into my eyes

Step off

And just believe in wings

As we free fall

Leaving this life

Follow me…

We’ll finally be…

Together…

No questions asked…

Hidden Blessing


Lying in the grass under the stars
Just me
My thoughts
And God

Normally silent
I spoke out loud
It was time I let it go

Anger
Fear
Frustration
It all came out

No crying
No shouting
But I know I should have used a calmer tone

Why?
What for?
How can this be I asked

I need answers now
And fast

Silence only greeted my inpatient tone

The only sound I heard was the wind blow

Frustrated even worse I rose to my feet
I give up
I quit
Can’t go on any more

Then a voice startled me
It spoke in my head

Soft in a whisper it said
Have patience child
You have come so far
But you’re not ready for the final part

All will end well
So for now walk
Don’t try to run

Enjoy what you found that seems so far away
Cherish it day by day

For I sent you a friend with a soul connection
Just be patient soon you will see the reason
From all this there will be a hidden blessing…

I Broke And Went Insane


A write from my dearest friend in the world the other half of my soul so to speak.
Very dark but I had to share this.

Tears fall
Broken
Beaten
Nothing left
No fight
Blood lines
Dizzy vision
Cold heart
My life
Gone
No longer
Wanting
To live

My pain
Is deeper than
The ocean

My heart
Is colder than
The north pole

My mind
Is darker
Than the night

My life
Is no longer
Worth living

Deepest fears
Now life
No control
Haunting misery

I have no shoes
So you can’t walk in them
Can’t experience my pain
Not understanding how
Deep the rabbit hole goes

Sorrowful tune
Slowly sung
Lost beauty
Hangman’s noose
Twisted tale
Of despair

My darkest hour
An insane womans story
Never ending

Lost
Broken
Hopeless
Gone
Insane
Weeping
Tears
Heart
Torn

Path Of Thorns

Story
Repeating
Crazy
Rant

Ghosts


Clouded mind
Ghosts of the past

Trespassing
Haunting

Prayed against
Exercised to no end

Screamed at
Ignored

Raging fury
Demanded to leave

Ghosts of the past
Skeletons without mercy

Under a spell
A weight you can’t comprehend

A silent curse

Smiling on the outside

Ghostly demons within…

Too Much


Too great a burden
Too much to handle

For so long
These things
This life
All this suffering
Every ounce of pain
Foolish to think could be contained

Back to the start now
Square one

Dam has burst
Torrent of darkness

Head full of demons
Payment due for past transgressions

Slipping
Falling

Voices tempting
Pull the trigger

Emotionless
Eyes dry

Smoking barrel
Just all to much to handle…